Do You Know What You Want?

Do You Know What You Want?

Do you want to know who you are? Don t ask. Act! Action will delineate and define you.
~ Thomas Jefferson

Each of us has an inner urge to change and become all that we can be. Unless and until we define what that is, because you can only change yourself, we cannot create it nor magnetize it into our experience. And so we begin this article with the thought provoking question: “Do you know what you want?”

Please be aware that I am talking only about what YOU want. The ability to desire was there when you were born, and from the beginning, you’ve been exercising your desire. At some point, some of us give up on our own desires and defer to others desires for us, our parents most of all. If you are living life to serve your parents, YOU are left out of that equation. I urge you to put YOU back in. Again, do you know what you want?

Let’s try an experiment to discover what you want. Can you sit in front of your computer, or sit with a tablet in your lap, or be prepared to talk your desires out loud to a friend who will write them down. Set a timer for a short period of time – say, ten to twenty minutes. Set aside all of the desires of any other in your life, and write from your heart. Begin every sentence with “I want” and continue to write until the timer bell rings.

Now, sit quietly and review what you have written. You may be amazed at what has come up from deep inside you. Do not sit in judgment of what you wrote. Don’t go to the negative places inside you that begin to offer excuses or reasons why what you want can never happen. Instead, try the next step. (You may not be able to do this until a following day due to the emotional impact of your first exercise.)

“What if” is the next step. Ask yourself (and write down the answers, or have a friend help by writing for you so you can just let it flow) all the ‘what if’ questions that come to your mind. Here are some examples: What if my parents are furious with me? What if I can’t find the money to make the plan work? What if I don’t know enough influential people to help me? What if I never work on any of my own desires and dreams? What if my brothers and sisters ridicule me? What if I have to go get an advanced university degree?

Actually, your own ‘what if’ statements are the very objections you will have to overcome in order to fulfill your own dreams and desires. Let’s look at what can sometimes be the biggest what if. What if my parents are furious with me? If your parents have always wanted you to be in a profession that they think is wonderful, but your desires don’t align with them, you’ve got lots more questions to ask your own good self.

Can I live my life without my own dreams? Did my parents live their parents dreams? What motivates my parents to have such big dreams for me? Do my parents know how much stress their dreams cause for me? Can I talk to them about this issue? What words can I use to let them see the validity of my own dreams?

Once you know what you want, you can change and take the steps to get it. But first, since only you can change yourself, you have to know what it is you want.

“You can never get enough of what you don t want.” ~ Wayne Dyer

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